








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 370 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 136 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1747 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,467 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2241 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1986 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1062 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1178 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $385,764 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 266 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Orrz | 65% | 31 |
| #2 | mind cntrl | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | ORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRZZZZZZZZZZZ | 60% | 52 |
| #4 | FjallaGyðingurツ™ | 59% | 39 |
| #5 | VEJAY-_- | 58% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | samuel | +2.03 | 75 | 65 |
| #2 | VEJAY-_- | +1.96 | 76 | 60 |
| #3 | Orrz | +0.43 | 68 | 76 |
| #4 | Wadji | +0.12 | 59 | 61 |
| #5 | mind cntrl | -0.02 | 86 | 65 |





