








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 184 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 141 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1469 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,536 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 951 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1220 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1280 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1085 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $515,776 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 131 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mind cntrl | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | 7OXIC | 70% | 20 |
| #3 | FjallaGyðingurツ™ | 62% | 39 |
| #4 | samuel | 60% | 52 |
| #5 | e1nfalt | 59% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Wadji | 50% | 36 |
| #13 | Orsen | 46% | 13 |
| #14 | Player1 | 44% | 9 |
| #15 | rufus | 44% | 16 |
| #16 | artur | 41% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hunter | 1 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | samuel | 256 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | Orrz | 181 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | FjallaGyðingurツ™ | 113 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | Wadji | 100 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | VEJAY-_- | 98 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Serton♝ | +3.58 | 70 | 72 |
| #2 | e1nfalt | +3.51 | 83 | 68 |
| #3 | mind cntrl | +3.17 | 92 | 66 |
| #4 | VEJAY-_- | +2.94 | 80 | 58 |
| #5 | Hunter | +1.19 | 89 | 70 |





