








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 122 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1157 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,490 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 237 | 7% |
| Smokes | 869 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1282 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 1102 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $792,025 of utility $210 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 56 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Gareck | 54% | 13 |
| #2 | cruple | 52% | 29 |
| #3 | MainBruws | 51% | 101 |
| #4 | politimann | 50% | 137 |
| #5 | Turbosweet | 49% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | cruple | 52% | 29 |
| #3 | MainBruws | 51% | 101 |
| #4 | politimann | 50% | 137 |
| #5 | Turbosweet | 49% | 76 |
| #6 | ATG | 45% | 119 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MainBruws | 7 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | politimann | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | ATG | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Turbosweet | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | cruple | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | politimann | 333 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | Turbosweet | 189 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | cruple | 158 | 0.30 | 4 min |
| #4 | MainBruws | 131 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | ATG | 94 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MainBruws | +1.65 | 71 | 46 |
| #2 | politimann | +1.39 | 77 | 59 |
| #3 | cruple | -0.06 | 39 | 65 |
| #4 | Turbosweet | -0.15 | 51 | 47 |
| #5 | ✪ Gareck | -0.24 | 82 | 49 |





