








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 581 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1444 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




115 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7789 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,451 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8857 | 27% |
| Smokes | 14004 | 43% |
| HE Grenades | 5308 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 4282 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,498,003 of utility $48 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 300 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.Cookie | 51% | 383 |
| #2 | B33R | 47% | 90 |
| #3 | m0L3stR | 45% | 77 |
| #4 | ✪ $imon | 44% | 702 |
| #5 | [AA] Walter | 40% | 156 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ✪ $imon | 44% | 702 |
| #5 | [AA] Walter | 40% | 156 |
| #6 | BóbbíChúlló | 40% | 251 |
| #7 | BLAZE | 36% | 132 |
| #8 | vettski | 35% | 140 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.Cookie | 32 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | ✪ $imon | 28 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | vettski | 18 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | BLAZE | 15 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | BóbbíChúlló | 7 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ $imon | 1425 | 0.10 | 35 min |
| #2 | BóbbíChúlló | 873 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #3 | Mr.Cookie | 387 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| #4 | vettski | 284 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #5 | BLAZE | 162 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vettski | +4.26 | 75 | 47 |
| #2 | Mr.Cookie | +2.19 | 43 | 45 |
| #3 | B33R | +0.89 | 9 | 49 |
| #4 | BLAZE | +0.73 | 39 | 41 |
| #5 | ✪ $imon | +0.57 | 24 | 56 |





