








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 242 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1418 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,725 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1936 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1873 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 564 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 1352 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $161,700 of utility $44 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | atilla | 60% | 109 |
| #2 | s1berias | 56% | 114 |
| #3 | GOD_of_the_Elephants | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | IraniaMF | 46% | 74 |
| #5 | Sion | 43% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | atilla | 60% | 109 |
| #2 | s1berias | 56% | 114 |
| #3 | GOD_of_the_Elephants | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | IraniaMF | 46% | 74 |
| #5 | Sion | 43% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | atilla | 16 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | IraniaMF | 13 | 0.0085 |
| #3 | s1berias | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Sion | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | GOD_of_the_Elephants | 1 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s1berias | 272 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | atilla | 173 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | IraniaMF | 106 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | Sion | 53 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | GOD_of_the_Elephants | 9 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s1berias | +2.60 | 74 | 56 |
| #2 | atilla | +0.34 | 63 | 49 |
| #3 | Sion | +0.19 | 66 | 51 |
| #4 | Douglas B. | -0.61 | 53 | 57 |
| #5 | IraniaMF | -2.29 | 36 | 49 |





