








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1626 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 136 matches | ||
| Wingman | 131 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




103 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5043 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,107 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7060 | 37% |
| Smokes | 4436 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2684 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 4927 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,609,239 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1137 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SYRUS | 70% | 92 |
| #2 | Eigys | 63% | 81 |
| #3 | John H. | 60% | 169 |
| #4 | timapp | 58% | 52 |
| #5 | kot | 53% | 210 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SYRUS | 70% | 92 |
| #2 | Eigys | 63% | 81 |
| #3 | John H. | 60% | 169 |
| #4 | timapp | 58% | 52 |
| #5 | kot | 53% | 210 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kot | 51 | 0.0128 |
| #2 | John H. | 37 | 0.0114 |
| #3 | Eigys | 7 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | SYRUS | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | timapp | 4 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kot | 428 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #2 | John H. | 358 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #3 | timapp | 148 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | SYRUS | 132 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | Eigys | 120 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SYRUS | +4.00 | 52 | 36 |
| #2 | John H. | +1.55 | 48 | 49 |
| #3 | Unpredicably | +0.57 | 37 | 46 |
| #4 | Eigys | -0.17 | 35 | 42 |
| #5 | kot | -0.37 | 37 | 31 |





