








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 535 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 101 matches | ||
| Wingman | 96 matches | ||
| Faceit | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2626 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,372 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2459 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2196 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2471 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2246 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $615,924 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 154 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | not Zore | 56% | 86 |
| #2 | T4V33 | 55% | 149 |
| #3 | TUOSTA! NAGAR | 54% | 24 |
| #4 | valeasu | 54% | 69 |
| #5 | Jix | 53% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | T4V33 | 15 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | Roni Boris Varonen | 13 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | not Zore | 10 | 0.0061 |
| #4 | TAIKURI | 5 | 0.0162 |
| #5 | valeasu | 4 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | T4V33 | 372 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | not Zore | 349 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #3 | Roni Boris Varonen | 185 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | valeasu | 94 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | Jix | 48 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MAN1C | +1.59 | 59 | 68 |
| #2 | T4V33 | +0.64 | 56 | 56 |
| #3 | not Zore | +0.55 | 75 | 53 |
| #4 | Jix | +0.39 | 77 | 27 |
| #5 | Roni Boris Varonen | -0.19 | 65 | 40 |





