








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1645 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 192 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 161 matches | ||
| Premier | 103 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




82 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6311 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,086 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7365 | 35% |
| Smokes | 5508 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4438 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3775 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,267,671 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 441 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Himejoshi Enjoyer | 62% | 97 |
| #2 | Bocchi | 54% | 90 |
| #3 | Abang Og Aura | 54% | 225 |
| #4 | EnglishName | 52% | 423 |
| #5 | Dr Goon | 48% | 471 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | EnglishName | 52% | 423 |
| #5 | Dr Goon | 48% | 471 |
| #6 | Tante Rafi | 47% | 247 |
| #7 | レイ | 47% | 193 |
| #8 | N | 42% | 123 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EnglishName | 112 | 0.0129 |
| #2 | レイ | 76 | 0.0197 |
| #3 | Abang Og Aura | 40 | 0.0089 |
| #4 | Dr Goon | 32 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Bocchi | 30 | 0.0164 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Abang Og Aura | 1277 | 0.28 | 34 min |
| #2 | EnglishName | 932 | 0.11 | 21 min |
| #3 | Tante Rafi | 727 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #4 | Dr Goon | 493 | 0.05 | 11 min |
| #5 | レイ | 240 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EnglishName | +3.28 | 72 | 55 |
| #2 | Himejoshi Enjoyer | +0.56 | 45 | 48 |
| #3 | レイ | +0.53 | 74 | 39 |
| #4 | Bocchi | +0.39 | 68 | 49 |
| #5 | Dr Goon | +0.36 | 55 | 49 |





