








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 278 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 198 matches | ||
| Premier | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4182 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,814 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5408 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6555 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 4169 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3682 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,398,019 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 204 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | itz_Sic | 59% | 59 |
| #2 | ᏁᎧᎮᏋ | 56% | 108 |
| #3 | ヤESOR | 54% | 61 |
| #4 | Mr. Potato Aim | 53% | 47 |
| #5 | FΛDΣD | 53% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Netscape | 52% | 103 |
| #8 | Rebels | 52% | 104 |
| #9 | abe722 | 46% | 28 |
| #10 | dabearSHARK | 38% | 37 |
| #11 | PaPa VaC | 28% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rebels | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | ᏁᎧᎮᏋ | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | FΛDΣD | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | ヤESOR | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Netscape | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᏁᎧᎮᏋ | 620 | 0.26 | 19 min |
| #2 | Mr. Potato Aim | 292 | 0.29 | 7 min |
| #3 | FΛDΣD | 245 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | itz_Sic | 242 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #5 | PaPa VaC | 171 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᏁᎧᎮᏋ | +2.72 | 78 | 78 |
| #2 | Arch3r | +2.15 | 77 | 48 |
| #3 | Mr. Potato Aim | +2.04 | 91 | 70 |
| #4 | abe722 | +1.08 | 74 | 67 |
| #5 | Netscape | +0.68 | 60 | 51 |





