








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 25 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 136 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




58 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2109 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,480 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1018 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1640 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1838 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1984 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $654,488 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 247 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RuhsussahPuffahs | 83% | 18 |
| #2 | gabe | 67% | 15 |
| #3 | tsu | 55% | 85 |
| #4 | Moucha | 50% | 139 |
| #5 | Shwe Easy | 46% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Moucha | 50% | 139 |
| #5 | Shwe Easy | 46% | 84 |
| #6 | Krisz | 41% | 56 |
| #7 | ohhi | 23% | 13 |
| #8 | sewerperson fan | 14% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moucha | 53 | 0.0182 |
| #2 | Krisz | 24 | 0.0204 |
| #3 | sewerperson fan | 8 | 0.0267 |
| #4 | tsu | 6 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Shwe Easy | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moucha | 332 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #2 | Krisz | 287 | 0.24 | 9 min |
| #3 | Shwe Easy | 186 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | tsu | 170 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | RuhsussahPuffahs | 51 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gabe | +2.93 | 89 | 38 |
| #2 | RuhsussahPuffahs | +2.30 | 77 | 63 |
| #3 | Krisz | +2.04 | 92 | 74 |
| #4 | Moucha | +1.25 | 84 | 68 |
| #5 | rae | +0.54 | 73 | 55 |





