








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 571 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




136 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3168 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,468 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2836 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2296 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3174 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2162 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $580,635 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 835 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | kaala | 38% | 16 |
| #9 | Hessu | 36% | 138 |
| #10 | i'm cheater | 31% | 16 |
| #11 | jojoshop.com | 25% | 32 |
| #12 | suomivihu paska vihu | 24% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hessu | 83 | 0.0331 |
| #2 | nuugi | 32 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | M1k0 | 16 | 0.0140 |
| #4 | jojoshop.com | 16 | 0.0258 |
| #5 | jaLmaRi | 14 | 0.0137 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nuugi | 483 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #2 | Hessu | 246 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | jaLmaRi | 129 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | kaala | 99 | 0.30 | 2 min |
| #5 | jojoshop.com | 91 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nuugi | +5.80 | 72 | 70 |
| #2 | doki- | +1.59 | 85 | 29 |
| #3 | jaLmaRi | +1.31 | 52 | 62 |
| #4 | vikkelä patu | +1.23 | 75 | 58 |
| #5 | Buwe | +0.82 | 28 | 46 |





