








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1005 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 476 matches | ||
| Premier | 141 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8487 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,200 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5480 | 23% |
| Smokes | 8059 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 5886 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4775 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,604,592 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 114 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fofo | 58% | 265 |
| #2 | slezinak | 58% | 393 |
| #3 | La Morte | 57% | 210 |
| #4 | Luky *Laco* GuardiaN | 56% | 342 |
| #5 | geco na pleco | 54% | 457 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | geco na pleco | 19 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | slezinak | 9 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Luky *Laco* GuardiaN | 7 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | La Morte | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | Ross Crock | 4 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | geco na pleco | 578 | 0.06 | 11 min |
| #2 | Luky *Laco* GuardiaN | 415 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| #3 | slezinak | 405 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| #4 | Fofo | 366 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #5 | La Morte | 243 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NKwastaken | +2.30 | 85 | 70 |
| #2 | La Morte | +0.85 | 86 | 55 |
| #3 | slezinak | +0.39 | 85 | 45 |
| #4 | geco na pleco | -0.15 | 66 | 51 |
| #5 | Luky *Laco* GuardiaN | -0.44 | 64 | 54 |





