








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 590 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 301 matches | ||
| Faceit | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4665 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,434 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4289 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4329 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4404 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3412 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,137,393 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 34 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KoriFee | 60% | 40 |
| #2 | napexXx- | 59% | 66 |
| #3 | Tac | 54% | 39 |
| #4 | haschi2 | 53% | 49 |
| #5 | Pille2212 | 53% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Timmeh | 52% | 71 |
| #9 | forty4our | 51% | 35 |
| #10 | EFFiciencY | 47% | 101 |
| #11 | Grobidumm | 46% | 50 |
| #12 | VelTroX | 41% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roberto ಠ_ಠ | 6 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | VraM | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | EFFiciencY | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Timmeh | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Grobidumm | 2 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roberto ಠ_ಠ | 411 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #2 | VraM | 389 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #3 | Timmeh | 293 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #4 | EFFiciencY | 274 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #5 | KoriFee | 157 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VelTroX | +2.61 | 90 | 62 |
| #2 | forty4our | +1.38 | 82 | 71 |
| #3 | KoriFee | +1.37 | 77 | 74 |
| #4 | Pille2212 | +1.00 | 74 | 58 |
| #5 | haschi2 | +0.84 | 68 | 70 |





