








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 568 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 263 matches | ||
| Premier | 120 matches | ||
| Faceit | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




72 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5447 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,139 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3705 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4450 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3420 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3564 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,389,187 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1072 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1ber | 52% | 90 |
| #2 | Rewaldt | 52% | 52 |
| #3 | Alf | 47% | 108 |
| #4 | b1g1 | 37% | 59 |
| #5 | Eli | 30% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1ber | 52% | 90 |
| #2 | Rewaldt | 52% | 52 |
| #3 | Alf | 47% | 108 |
| #4 | b1g1 | 37% | 59 |
| #5 | Eli | 30% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alf | 33 | 0.0176 |
| #2 | 1ber | 25 | 0.0143 |
| #3 | b1g1 | 12 | 0.0117 |
| #4 | Eli | 12 | 0.0155 |
| #5 | Rewaldt | 7 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rewaldt | 171 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | Alf | 170 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | 1ber | 125 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | Eli | 89 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | b1g1 | 71 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1ber | +2.65 | 76 | 46 |
| #2 | Noscar | +1.72 | 74 | 51 |
| #3 | Rewaldt | +0.31 | 64 | 61 |
| #4 | Eli | -3.35 | 56 | 35 |
| #5 | Alf | -4.26 | 35 | 41 |





