








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 65 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 143 matches | ||
| Wingman | 96 matches | ||
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




143 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4466 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,094 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1709 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1361 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1840 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1184 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $135,378 of utility $15 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1281 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prinsessa tare | 70% | 37 |
| #2 | Don't buy Utility | 69% | 65 |
| #3 | shitbox | 68% | 28 |
| #4 | Poisuiner | 68% | 56 |
| #5 | rotuerottelija | 59% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | rotuerottelija | 59% | 78 |
| #6 | t | 51% | 111 |
| #7 | PerdeZz | 51% | 282 |
| #8 | Mitjaﱞﱞﱞ | 36% | 39 |
| #9 | big booty lover 69420 | 27% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PerdeZz | 74 | 0.0151 |
| #2 | t | 30 | 0.0134 |
| #3 | Mitjaﱞﱞﱞ | 28 | 0.0420 |
| #4 | big booty lover 69420 | 16 | 0.0337 |
| #5 | rotuerottelija | 12 | 0.0081 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PerdeZz | 788 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #2 | t | 279 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | Poisuiner | 241 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #4 | Mitjaﱞﱞﱞ | 239 | 0.36 | 4 min |
| #5 | rotuerottelija | 166 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shitbox | +5.52 | 82 | 66 |
| #2 | Mitjaﱞﱞﱞ | +5.06 | 80 | 45 |
| #3 | rotuerottelija | +2.74 | 91 | 58 |
| #4 | Olen_paska | +1.60 | 63 | 27 |
| #5 | PerdeZz | +0.74 | 58 | 50 |





