








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 233 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2634 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,234 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3156 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2590 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2128 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1360 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $653,113 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 464 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | karinasyodel | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | .year | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | Der1vative | 63% | 16 |
| #4 | Lion | 59% | 17 |
| #5 | Automat0n^G | 51% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Der1vative | 63% | 16 |
| #4 | Lion | 59% | 17 |
| #5 | Automat0n^G | 51% | 49 |
| #6 | Bren | 50% | 34 |
| #7 | iGot5 #OOFK | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bren | 3 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Automat0n^G | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Lion | 2 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | .year | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | karinasyodel | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Automat0n^G | 262 | 0.27 | 7 min |
| #2 | Bren | 161 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #3 | .year | 142 | 0.30 | 6 min |
| #4 | Lion | 115 | 0.31 | 3 min |
| #5 | Der1vative | 88 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bren | +2.58 | 83 | 66 |
| #2 | Der1vative | +2.49 | 86 | 62 |
| #3 | Automat0n^G | +2.04 | 78 | 66 |
| #4 | iGot5 #OOFK | +1.32 | 69 | 51 |
| #5 | Lion | +1.31 | 61 | 65 |





