








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 605 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 95 matches | ||
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3407 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,487 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 937 | 11% |
| Smokes | 3161 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 2065 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2324 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,071,647 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 435 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kr3a7ur | 78% | 27 |
| #2 | Catsmonke TAG | 68% | 44 |
| #3 | Digi | 65% | 20 |
| #4 | Gizzy | 61% | 23 |
| #5 | KryB0b | 58% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #16 | FemboyNova | 49% | 49 |
| #17 | Temp0h | 46% | 24 |
| #18 | Hector Salamanca's Kitten | 38% | 24 |
| #19 | mehlodey | 35% | 23 |
| #20 | NadiaRoxz | 33% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iro | 13 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | FemboyNova | 13 | 0.0120 |
| #3 | JΛDΞRSXD | 8 | 0.0115 |
| #4 | kai-b | 7 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | Odahh | 6 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iro | 289 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | Odahh | 242 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #3 | kai-b | 231 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | JΛDΞRSXD | 167 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #5 | FemboyNova | 135 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Av3ry | +4.04 | 69 | 52 |
| #2 | peath | +3.74 | 83 | 58 |
| #3 | Andy ^^ | +3.21 | 65 | 63 |
| #4 | kr3a7ur | +2.71 | 78 | 49 |
| #5 | JΛDΞRSXD | +2.63 | 62 | 66 |





