








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 311 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 157 matches | ||
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3756 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,659 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3106 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2683 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 4716 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 3154 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $851,478 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 271 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | raimo | 58% | 24 |
| #2 | imbanssi | 57% | 28 |
| #3 | Hinuriseta | 51% | 35 |
| #4 | Setti Esa | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | palmolive | 50% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Hinuriseta | 51% | 35 |
| #4 | Setti Esa | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | palmolive | 50% | 70 |
| #6 | He5d M1n1ster | 46% | 72 |
| #7 | JimboSlice | 44% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | He5d M1n1ster | 9 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | palmolive | 8 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | JimboSlice | 7 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Hinuriseta | 4 | 0.0051 |
| #5 | raimo | 4 | 0.0078 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | He5d M1n1ster | 294 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #2 | Hinuriseta | 257 | 0.32 | 7 min |
| #3 | JimboSlice | 140 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | raimo | 122 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #5 | palmolive | 117 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hinuriseta | +2.60 | 79 | 74 |
| #2 | raimo | +2.48 | 63 | 69 |
| #3 | Zeihan | +1.50 | 59 | 65 |
| #4 | Setti Esa | +1.41 | 53 | 57 |
| #5 | imbanssi | +1.37 | 69 | 64 |





