








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 988 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 353 matches | ||
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 54 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 115 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7349 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,855 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6752 | 28% |
| Smokes | 7697 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 4222 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5184 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,595,200 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2465 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | edogmega | 51% | 39 |
| #7 | cow | 51% | 218 |
| #8 | kairos | 51% | 61 |
| #9 | angle ♥ | 49% | 47 |
| #10 | abe | 49% | 182 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crankin ma hog | +3.12 | 87 | 73 |
| #2 | SUPERORGANISM | +3.03 | 73 | 59 |
| #3 | maid | +0.36 | 64 | 63 |
| #4 | Sutol☂ | +0.28 | 66 | 48 |
| #5 | Mr.Wiggie | -0.25 | 85 | 51 |





