








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 233 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1643 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,930 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1374 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1141 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1370 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1045 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $387,393 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 59 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dogofogo | 90% | 10 |
| #2 | prc):) | 87% | 23 |
| #3 | batomeu | 84% | 25 |
| #4 | ''Cr33ck'' | 58% | 12 |
| #5 | Prezervat1 | 56% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | kUUbA | 52% | 23 |
| #9 | Re5pect | 50% | 12 |
| #10 | joda | 50% | 36 |
| #11 | Algor1Tmus | 44% | 16 |
| #12 | Filios | 37% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Filios | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Prezervat1 | 3 | 0.0078 |
| #3 | joda | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | kUUbA | 2 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | ''Cr33ck'' | 2 | 0.0080 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Filios | 108 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #2 | Prezervat1 | 96 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #3 | ''Cr33ck'' | 78 | 0.31 | 3 min |
| #4 | batomeu | 70 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | joda | 61 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prc):) | +4.49 | 71 | 39 |
| #2 | batomeu | +2.07 | 76 | 61 |
| #3 | Popetallica CHIRURGU | +2.06 | 88 | 72 |
| #4 | ''Cr33ck'' | +1.79 | 75 | 74 |
| #5 | kUUbA | +1.42 | 87 | 73 |





