








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 305 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 208 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4251 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,085 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3773 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5091 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 2649 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2572 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,838,935 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2892 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Billiam | 57% | 30 |
| #2 | tjcola | 52% | 248 |
| #3 | ImGonnaBashYou | 52% | 421 |
| #4 | bl00dhound | 49% | 479 |
| #5 | diamondminer48 | 41% | 133 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Billiam | 57% | 30 |
| #2 | tjcola | 52% | 248 |
| #3 | ImGonnaBashYou | 52% | 421 |
| #4 | bl00dhound | 49% | 479 |
| #5 | diamondminer48 | 41% | 133 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ImGonnaBashYou | 66 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | bl00dhound | 21 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | tjcola | 16 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | diamondminer48 | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Billiam | 3 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tjcola | 333 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #2 | diamondminer48 | 192 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | ImGonnaBashYou | 115 | 0.01 | 2 min |
| #4 | Billiam | 46 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | bl00dhound | 27 | 0.00 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Billiam | +6.66 | 76 | 59 |
| #2 | tjcola | +4.50 | 61 | 36 |
| #3 | ImGonnaBashYou | +2.56 | 52 | 14 |
| #4 | diamondminer48 | +0.22 | 39 | 47 |
| #5 | a small, indiscernable object | -0.61 | 27 | 48 |





