








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 552 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 356 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 104 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7148 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,618 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8464 | 37% |
| Smokes | 5354 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4856 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3944 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,450,781 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 643 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nybia | 57% | 53 |
| #2 | Inqu1red | 57% | 145 |
| #3 | Pigeon | 54% | 71 |
| #4 | brooklyn | 53% | 128 |
| #5 | Terra | 50% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | K6 Jr | 48% | 88 |
| #7 | Cynara | 47% | 99 |
| #8 | Prototype | 44% | 156 |
| #9 | zystie | 43% | 83 |
| #10 | KugelBlitZ | 36% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brooklyn | 35 | 0.0134 |
| #2 | Prototype | 29 | 0.0091 |
| #3 | Inqu1red | 25 | 0.0085 |
| #4 | Pigeon | 13 | 0.0092 |
| #5 | nybia | 9 | 0.0084 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prototype | 495 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #2 | Inqu1red | 388 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #3 | zystie | 245 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | Cynara | 217 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | brooklyn | 214 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Inqu1red | +2.61 | 82 | 62 |
| #2 | nybia | +2.41 | 41 | 45 |
| #3 | savant | +1.21 | 60 | 71 |
| #4 | brooklyn | -0.21 | 57 | 52 |
| #5 | KugelBlitZ | -0.53 | 79 | 40 |





