








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 336 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 196 matches | ||
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2515 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,682 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2030 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2195 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1576 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1881 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $964,783 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 109 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kokis | 55% | 47 |
| #2 | arsk4b | 53% | 93 |
| #3 | Nipa | 51% | 177 |
| #4 | Ruupe | 49% | 215 |
| #5 | manse | 49% | 217 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | arsk4b | 53% | 93 |
| #3 | Nipa | 51% | 177 |
| #4 | Ruupe | 49% | 215 |
| #5 | manse | 49% | 217 |
| #6 | Leewhy | 45% | 154 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ruupe | 10 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | manse | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Nipa | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Leewhy | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | kokis | 3 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nipa | 734 | 0.19 | 16 min |
| #2 | Ruupe | 527 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #3 | manse | 443 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #4 | Leewhy | 275 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #5 | arsk4b | 101 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ruupe | +2.66 | 89 | 54 |
| #2 | manse | +0.71 | 81 | 62 |
| #3 | Nipa | +0.16 | 85 | 61 |
| #4 | arsk4b | -0.17 | 73 | 34 |
| #5 | kokis | -0.44 | 77 | 42 |





