








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 78 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 112 matches | ||
| Premier | 67 matches | ||
| Wingman | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1680 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,232 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1688 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1776 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2996 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2772 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $553,199 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | TT | 53% | 72 |
| #6 | kung fu kenny | 50% | 24 |
| #7 | FAKUBLADII | 48% | 105 |
| #8 | Daddy Rasmussen! | 46% | 72 |
| #9 | Relko | 29% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hansen | +4.42 | 55 | 83 |
| #2 | kung fu kenny | +2.85 | 75 | 65 |
| #3 | TT | +2.57 | 54 | 77 |
| #4 | Umulig | +1.89 | 78 | 65 |
| #5 | FAKUBLADII | +1.33 | 41 | 54 |





