








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 778 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 259 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 51 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3569 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,249 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4289 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3197 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3638 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4125 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,122,520 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 135 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nmk | 63% | 92 |
| #2 | ZZMDSG | 62% | 92 |
| #3 | ✪akaza | 54% | 204 |
| #4 | 筋肉CHINPOバトル | 53% | 43 |
| #5 | purple | 51% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪akaza | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | purple | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Nmk | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | ZZMDSG | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Zekamashi | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nmk | 679 | 0.37 | 16 min |
| #2 | ayati- | 478 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #3 | ✪akaza | 396 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #4 | ZZMDSG | 323 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #5 | purple | 237 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZZMDSG | +2.17 | 65 | 63 |
| #2 | 河野太郎 | +1.74 | 71 | 44 |
| #3 | ✪akaza | +1.46 | 68 | 48 |
| #4 | 筋肉CHINPOバトル | +1.36 | 73 | 45 |
| #5 | Raincoat | +1.09 | 87 | 50 |





