








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 735 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 352 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4297 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,550 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1434 | 12% |
| Smokes | 3894 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2861 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3361 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,684,412 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 687 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spin To Win | 59% | 54 |
| #2 | Late | 58% | 66 |
| #3 | Kinkkupitsa | 53% | 312 |
| #4 | Jarskiboi | 51% | 314 |
| #5 | Taikaneekeri | 49% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spin To Win | 59% | 54 |
| #2 | Late | 58% | 66 |
| #3 | Kinkkupitsa | 53% | 312 |
| #4 | Jarskiboi | 51% | 314 |
| #5 | Taikaneekeri | 49% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jarskiboi | 17 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Kinkkupitsa | 14 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Taikaneekeri | 9 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | Spin To Win | 7 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | Late | 4 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kinkkupitsa | 869 | 0.13 | 20 min |
| #2 | Jarskiboi | 575 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #3 | Taikaneekeri | 273 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #4 | Late | 144 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Spin To Win | 13 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kinkkupitsa | +1.89 | 64 | 53 |
| #2 | Jamal | +1.24 | 65 | 50 |
| #3 | Taikaneekeri | +1.02 | 70 | 56 |
| #4 | Jarskiboi | -1.38 | 45 | 40 |
| #5 | Late | -1.97 | 46 | 59 |





