








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 334 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 164 matches | ||
| Premier | 71 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3408 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,273 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3509 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2973 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1664 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2127 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $769,497 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 336 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tshiken | 65% | 37 |
| #2 | DragZ | 53% | 15 |
| #3 | Quacc | 52% | 31 |
| #4 | Pry | Gismo | 48% | 52 |
| #5 | Priminity | vaniLLa | 46% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Priminity | vaniLLa | 46% | 71 |
| #6 | EroTec.™ | 46% | 103 |
| #7 | CINO ♥♥ | 42% | 26 |
| #8 | who is peQs? | 42% | 36 |
| #9 | sh1rq | 41% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pry | Gismo | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | CINO ♥♥ | 3 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | EroTec.™ | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | Priminity | vaniLLa | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | who is peQs? | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EroTec.™ | 467 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #2 | Priminity | vaniLLa | 194 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | tshiken | 159 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #4 | who is peQs? | 124 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #5 | CINO ♥♥ | 114 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DragZ | +3.55 | 83 | 63 |
| #2 | tshiken | +2.72 | 86 | 60 |
| #3 | -D9_ | +1.12 | 86 | 58 |
| #4 | who is peQs? | +0.92 | 77 | 71 |
| #5 | Quacc | +0.14 | 50 | 70 |





