








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 341 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
854 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,250 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1040 | 32% |
| Smokes | 686 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 919 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 605 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $307,855 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 68 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | nuuttis | 43% | 23 |
| #11 | Tekijä! | 41% | 29 |
| #12 | Antimite | 38% | 13 |
| #13 | munapussi | 30% | 10 |
| #14 | Karva | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bengaalintiikeri | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | ssssss | 2 | 0.0102 |
| #3 | Bobi | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Tekijä! | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | himas? sykerö | 1 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bobi | 166 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | Bengaalintiikeri | 85 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Tekijä! | 51 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | nuuttis | 39 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Antimite | 39 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bobi | +3.96 | 97 | 67 |
| #2 | mukila | +2.25 | 89 | 60 |
| #3 | Viktorb | +2.20 | 81 | 65 |
| #4 | ssssss | +1.85 | 57 | 58 |
| #5 | Antimite | +1.17 | 55 | 54 |





