








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 487 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 72 matches | ||
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1070 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,460 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1570 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1470 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1645 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 775 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $280,155 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1287 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dumezki | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | L1meXX | 64% | 100 |
| #3 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | 64% | 80 |
| #4 | Proomic | 54% | 41 |
| #5 | S4NDA | 50% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | 64% | 80 |
| #4 | Proomic | 54% | 41 |
| #5 | S4NDA | 50% | 34 |
| #6 | Tjorben | 40% | 10 |
| #7 | - ★ 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐚 | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Proomic | 11 | 0.0130 |
| #2 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | 6 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | Tjorben | 2 | 0.0101 |
| #4 | L1meXX | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | 420 | 0.25 | 13 min |
| #2 | L1meXX | 167 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | Proomic | 75 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | S4NDA | 30 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Tjorben | 26 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | +3.23 | 70 | 83 |
| #2 | Tjorben | +2.98 | 83 | 42 |
| #3 | Dumezki | +1.98 | 79 | 39 |
| #4 | Proomic | +1.83 | 69 | 62 |
| #5 | blu'e | Esportal.com | +0.90 | 62 | 70 |





