








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 83 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1236 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,525 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2140 | 39% |
| Smokes | 1087 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 999 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1299 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $454,108 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 94 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Uzbäckistan | 60% | 35 |
| #2 | Wσzard | 56% | 110 |
| #3 | alexeonder | 55% | 121 |
| #4 | Zils🌸 | 51% | 68 |
| #5 | Farnik | 48% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | alexeonder | 20 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | Uzbäckistan | 16 | 0.0249 |
| #3 | Wσzard | 13 | 0.0062 |
| #4 | Zils🌸 | 8 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | Farnik | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wσzard | +4.33 | 81 | 52 |
| #2 | Zils🌸 | +0.67 | 70 | 33 |
| #3 | Farnik | +0.05 | 46 | 41 |
| #4 | богдан(買春) | -0.40 | 56 | 62 |
| #5 | alexeonder | -0.42 | 61 | 37 |





