








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 143 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1320 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,695 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2058 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1049 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1532 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1056 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $309,551 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pwn | 49% | 37 |
| #2 | Im-Dubini♥ | 46% | 13 |
| #3 | Popeye | 44% | 9 |
| #4 | razwow | 44% | 61 |
| #5 | ☆ 《《 F[]X 》》 ☆ | 42% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Im-Dubini♥ | 46% | 13 |
| #3 | Popeye | 44% | 9 |
| #4 | razwow | 44% | 61 |
| #5 | ☆ 《《 F[]X 》》 ☆ | 42% | 43 |
| #6 | kxuzz | 32% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | razwow | 4 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | pwn | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | ☆ 《《 F[]X 》》 ☆ | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Im-Dubini♥ | 1 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | Popeye | 1 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☆ 《《 F[]X 》》 ☆ | 186 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | pwn | 136 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | razwow | 79 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | Im-Dubini♥ | 64 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #5 | kxuzz | 49 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | razwow | +2.64 | 86 | 44 |
| #2 | pwn | +0.55 | 50 | 74 |
| #3 | Im-Dubini♥ | -0.05 | 62 | 57 |
| #4 | ☆ 《《 F[]X 》》 ☆ | -0.13 | 36 | 84 |
| #5 | Popeye | -2.10 | 22 | 48 |





