








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 467 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3869 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,929 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1572 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2912 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1977 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2468 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,096,904 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 177 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tjörck | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | ♠ Killing Machine ♠ | 58% | 50 |
| #3 | 3amo ADRN | 58% | 26 |
| #4 | Kitty2120 | 51% | 41 |
| #5 | Fred | 51% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | ₷☯𝓁𝒾𝒟.- | 49% | 95 |
| #9 | Daidai | 47% | 34 |
| #10 | Yato | 46% | 71 |
| #11 | Neptune | | 43% | 46 |
| #12 | Lil Schaudi | 37% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yato | 10 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | ₷☯𝓁𝒾𝒟.- | 6 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Bombaaa | 5 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | ♠ Killing Machine ♠ | 5 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | Tjörck | 5 | 0.0111 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ₷☯𝓁𝒾𝒟.- | 380 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #2 | Lil Schaudi | 254 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #3 | Mr. Nice Guy | 194 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | Bombaaa | 160 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Kitty2120 | 138 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tjörck | +2.96 | 82 | 61 |
| #2 | ♠ Killing Machine ♠ | +2.51 | 91 | 56 |
| #3 | Mr. Nice Guy | +2.42 | 77 | 59 |
| #4 | 3amo ADRN | +1.84 | 79 | 81 |
| #5 | binkoff 373 | +1.72 | 71 | 49 |





