








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 219 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 139 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1991 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,111 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2225 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1422 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1659 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1805 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $440,417 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 133 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Miskrit ę°øé ć®ē天ē
§å¤§ | 66% | 29 |
| #2 | SĪĪĪĪ | 60% | 80 |
| #3 | evoQ | 59% | 78 |
| #4 | Yš“š“Zš“š“ ĆĶĆ | 59% | 102 |
| #5 | Doken | 55% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | SĪĪĪĪ | 60% | 80 |
| #3 | evoQ | 59% | 78 |
| #4 | Yš“š“Zš“š“ ĆĶĆ | 59% | 102 |
| #5 | Doken | 55% | 137 |
| #6 | Piozak | 46% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SĪĪĪĪ | 16 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | Doken | 12 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Yš“š“Zš“š“ ĆĶĆ | 8 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | evoQ | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Miskrit ę°øé ć®ē天ē
§å¤§ | 3 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doken | 583 | 0.21 | 13 min |
| #2 | Yš“š“Zš“š“ ĆĶĆ | 458 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #3 | evoQ | 266 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | SĪĪĪĪ | 161 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Miskrit ę°øé ć®ē天ē
§å¤§ | 54 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doken | +2.87 | 75 | 67 |
| #2 | evoQ | +1.16 | 78 | 67 |
| #3 | SĪĪĪĪ | +1.01 | 70 | 57 |
| #4 | Miskrit ę°øé ć®ē天ē
§å¤§ | -0.02 | 67 | 58 |
| #5 | Yš“š“Zš“š“ ĆĶĆ | -0.24 | 58 | 56 |





