








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 148 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 361 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4460 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,361 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4909 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2240 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 5478 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 1734 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,757,216 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 114 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | KKrap$i$ | 44% | 55 |
| #10 | ☢ | SpriditisLV | 43% | 35 |
| #11 | Seja | 42% | 43 |
| #12 | 𝖇𝖆𝖓𝖆𝖓𝖘 | 41% | 39 |
| #13 | NetZ | 37% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nice try man | 20 | 0.0085 |
| #2 | funydogpranks_1995 | 18 | 0.0129 |
| #3 | Flasher | 16 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | Seja | 11 | 0.0125 |
| #5 | ☢ | SpriditisLV | 7 | 0.0092 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flasher | 830 | 0.27 | 25 min |
| #2 | *memļaki* || zteN | 463 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #3 | funydogpranks_1995 | 212 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | 𝖇𝖆𝖓𝖆𝖓𝖘 | 179 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #5 | KKrap$i$ | 173 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Seja | +5.53 | 89 | 57 |
| #2 | *memļaki* || zteN | +4.53 | 79 | 74 |
| #3 | NetZ | +4.08 | 79 | 68 |
| #4 | krm$te | +2.90 | 67 | 70 |
| #5 | pharo | +1.52 | 49 | 68 |





