








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 653 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 342 matches | ||
| Premier | 204 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




101 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7517 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,181 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1597 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3036 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2396 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3152 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,000,844 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 173 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | >:( | 570 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #2 | SpawN Jr. | 565 | 0.32 | 13 min |
| #3 | An4rchy | 560 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #4 | ✪ Vern | 266 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #5 | Minter` # Commend` | 158 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KUROMY | +2.69 | 83 | 54 |
| #2 | Illyasviel von Einzbern | +2.30 | 85 | 29 |
| #3 | SpawN Jr. | +1.61 | 80 | 69 |
| #4 | Minter` # Commend` | +1.49 | 72 | 68 |
| #5 | An4rchy | +0.86 | 88 | 57 |





