








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 23 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 59 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1429 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,284 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1257 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1070 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1231 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 726 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $390,903 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 437 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TrePaNiX | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | Yillja | 70% | 44 |
| #3 | YuperYew | 69% | 13 |
| #4 | Olsen | 63% | 35 |
| #5 | Keiths Butler | 60% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | YuperYew | 69% | 13 |
| #4 | Olsen | 63% | 35 |
| #5 | Keiths Butler | 60% | 52 |
| #6 | joni | 57% | 7 |
| #7 | stQrmyyyw9w- | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yillja | 11 | 0.0122 |
| #2 | Keiths Butler | 5 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | YuperYew | 3 | 0.0123 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Olsen | 156 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #2 | Keiths Butler | 104 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Yillja | 47 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | YuperYew | 23 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #5 | stQrmyyyw9w- | 23 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TrePaNiX | +3.33 | 75 | 75 |
| #2 | stQrmyyyw9w- | +2.35 | 72 | 74 |
| #3 | turb0 | +2.27 | 79 | 62 |
| #4 | YuperYew | +1.24 | 73 | 49 |
| #5 | Yillja | +1.20 | 85 | 45 |





