








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 258 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 267 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1761 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,378 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1339 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2323 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2243 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2473 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,343,463 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 269 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrBlackMind | 62% | 39 |
| #2 | Fjette | 53% | 94 |
| #3 | kuda- | 52% | 202 |
| #4 | Hat | 51% | 281 |
| #5 | K-Lykke | 50% | 205 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Hat | 51% | 281 |
| #5 | K-Lykke | 50% | 205 |
| #6 | retsev | 50% | 136 |
| #7 | Mortenpå14 | 49% | 125 |
| #8 | ManningTheLeg | 46% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hat | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | retsev | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Fjette | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | kuda- | 1 | 0.0002 |
| #5 | ManningTheLeg | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kuda- | 696 | 0.16 | 20 min |
| #2 | Hat | 605 | 0.10 | 18 min |
| #3 | Mortenpå14 | 449 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #4 | retsev | 440 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #5 | ManningTheLeg | 176 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kuda- | +4.29 | 76 | 80 |
| #2 | retsev | +2.04 | 72 | 70 |
| #3 | Hat | +1.01 | 50 | 74 |
| #4 | Mortenpå14 | +0.75 | 65 | 65 |
| #5 | Fjette | -0.26 | 46 | 55 |





