








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 996 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 216 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 41 matches | ||
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




93 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5405 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,932 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5665 | 26% |
| Smokes | 6358 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 5186 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4723 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,550,597 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1700 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Computerkühler | 48% | 42 |
| #2 | Antonio Zavatti | 46% | 324 |
| #3 | Tilti | 46% | 258 |
| #4 | Lewster | 43% | 258 |
| #5 | Lks | 42% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Tilti | 46% | 258 |
| #4 | Lewster | 43% | 258 |
| #5 | Lks | 42% | 62 |
| #6 | v e c o | 36% | 136 |
| #7 | eintori | 34% | 208 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antonio Zavatti | 49 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Tilti | 14 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Lewster | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | v e c o | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | eintori | 7 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antonio Zavatti | 906 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #2 | Lewster | 465 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #3 | Tilti | 407 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #4 | v e c o | 231 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #5 | Lks | 205 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | v e c o | +6.66 | 87 | 61 |
| #2 | Lewster | +5.03 | 72 | 70 |
| #3 | Tilti | +4.08 | 72 | 55 |
| #4 | Lks | -0.39 | 65 | 53 |
| #5 | Punblade | -1.43 | 56 | 53 |





