








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 366 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 284 matches | ||
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3446 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,485 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6639 | 34% |
| Smokes | 5420 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3280 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 4146 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $702,216 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 77 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toad | 61% | 41 |
| #2 | django | 59% | 22 |
| #3 | Rise | 56% | 25 |
| #4 | SPOSJE | 50% | 38 |
| #5 | Botwright | 49% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | django | 59% | 22 |
| #3 | Rise | 56% | 25 |
| #4 | SPOSJE | 50% | 38 |
| #5 | Botwright | 49% | 37 |
| #6 | Frost | 47% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frost | 8 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | SPOSJE | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Botwright | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | django | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frost | 322 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | Toad | 145 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #3 | Botwright | 117 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | Rise | 108 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #5 | SPOSJE | 71 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | django | +3.87 | 86 | 61 |
| #2 | Botwright | +3.01 | 87 | 58 |
| #3 | Toad | +1.51 | 82 | 55 |
| #4 | Frost | +1.19 | 79 | 47 |
| #5 | Rise | +0.35 | 75 | 57 |





