










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 197 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
624 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,859 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1169 | 30% |
| Smokes | 974 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 760 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 956 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $114,219 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A.D | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | Colt.45 | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | BOT Alexei | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | Straat-Kat | 58% | 43 |
| #5 | Manik | 57% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Rainƒall | 40% | 5 |
| #12 | Sir mourning | 40% | 5 |
| #13 | Feynman | 29% | 7 |
| #14 | DrPanda_1 | 29% | 7 |
| #15 | Dr.X | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Straat-Kat | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Bigfatfrogg | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Nicky | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | A.D | 1 | 0.0076 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bigfatfrogg | 69 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #2 | Straat-Kat | 61 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | Feynman | 31 | 0.23 | 0 min |
| #4 | Manik | 30 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| #5 | DrPanda_1 | 29 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A.D | +4.21 | 68 | 56 |
| #2 | Manik | +3.28 | 34 | 58 |
| #3 | (>_VOSS_<) | +2.77 | 50 | 50 |
| #4 | Dr.X | +2.48 | 59 | 65 |
| #5 | Colt.45 | +1.43 | 42 | 71 |





