








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1146 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 516 matches | ||
| Wingman | 46 matches | ||
| Faceit | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 230 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5252 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,454 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10190 | 31% |
| Smokes | 8582 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 8318 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 5364 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,170,091 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2968 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skrrt♔ | 54% | 39 |
| #2 | Mbpapi | 51% | 353 |
| #3 | Sugar Daddy | 49% | 102 |
| #4 | Huggyy | 46% | 63 |
| #5 | Yer Da | 40% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skrrt♔ | 54% | 39 |
| #2 | Mbpapi | 51% | 353 |
| #3 | Sugar Daddy | 49% | 102 |
| #4 | Huggyy | 46% | 63 |
| #5 | Yer Da | 40% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mbpapi | 45 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | Sugar Daddy | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Yer Da | 4 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Huggyy | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | skrrt♔ | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mbpapi | 636 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #2 | Sugar Daddy | 168 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | skrrt♔ | 104 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Huggyy | 67 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Yer Da | 65 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Huggyy | +1.78 | 73 | 43 |
| #2 | skrrt♔ | +1.48 | 56 | 62 |
| #3 | Sugar Daddy | +0.57 | 43 | 49 |
| #4 | Mbpapi | +0.04 | 47 | 50 |
| #5 | ♿ rsn | +0.00 | 59 | 68 |





