








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 37 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 164 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




131 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6513 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,955 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3622 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3789 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4074 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3470 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,676,253 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cheezhed82 | 68% | 90 |
| #2 | phycast | 65% | 101 |
| #3 | doctor sex | 65% | 74 |
| #4 | Sphinx. | 62% | 102 |
| #5 | Ryderbest | 60% | 465 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Hollow Frost | 58% | 168 |
| #8 | hilts | 56% | 186 |
| #9 | Van_Dijk_op | 55% | 127 |
| #10 | Rat Cube | 54% | 72 |
| #11 | john f kennedy | 48% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hilts | 35 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | Van_Dijk_op | 29 | 0.0116 |
| #3 | john f kennedy | 28 | 0.0174 |
| #4 | Hollow Frost | 24 | 0.0073 |
| #5 | ynivan | 22 | 0.0100 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ryderbest | 580 | 0.06 | 11 min |
| #2 | hilts | 397 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | Hollow Frost | 275 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | doctor sex | 144 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Van_Dijk_op | 121 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fijiwater | +4.98 | 76 | 50 |
| #2 | cheezhed82 | +3.00 | 63 | 47 |
| #3 | doctor sex | +2.65 | 63 | 65 |
| #4 | Ryderbest | +1.88 | 52 | 41 |
| #5 | Sphinx. | +1.79 | 58 | 59 |





