








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 55 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
541 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 749 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 72 | 10% |
| Smokes | 262 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 259 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 156 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $187,157 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Chex | 40% | 35 |
| #12 | endless | 33% | 12 |
| #13 | Pooper:) | 33% | 12 |
| #14 | Schaumyy | 29% | 7 |
| #15 | lnkjoiwaeqdf | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kasvatti☆ | 19 | 0.0155 |
| #2 | baquete | 14 | 0.0259 |
| #3 | Chex | 9 | 0.0120 |
| #4 | endless | 8 | 0.0342 |
| #5 | walia6 | 3 | 0.0224 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kasvatti☆ | 186 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | ★ dak | 83 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #3 | baquete | 74 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | Andrew | 63 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | Chex | 52 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kasvatti☆ | +5.18 | 79 | 63 |
| #2 | Mez | +3.29 | 79 | 32 |
| #3 | walia6 | +3.08 | 81 | 44 |
| #4 | ★ dak | +1.85 | 86 | 64 |
| #5 | Andrew | +1.26 | 79 | 79 |





