








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1057 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,465 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1284 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1261 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 910 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1010 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $47,134 of utility $26 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 243 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jenks | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | K1ng♛Eddy | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | CaZuRaa | 63% | 49 |
| #4 | globin | 53% | 30 |
| #5 | Firesnowii | 50% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | globin | 53% | 30 |
| #5 | Firesnowii | 50% | 20 |
| #6 | 𝖇𝖚𝖋𝖋𝖞 | 49% | 39 |
| #7 | nooka *monkeyvacine.ru | 47% | 17 |
| #8 | bstN- | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | globin | 11 | 0.0233 |
| #2 | 𝖇𝖚𝖋𝖋𝖞 | 7 | 0.0116 |
| #3 | Firesnowii | 4 | 0.0119 |
| #4 | nooka *monkeyvacine.ru | 3 | 0.0152 |
| #5 | K1ng♛Eddy | 3 | 0.0169 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝖇𝖚𝖋𝖋𝖞 | 123 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #2 | CaZuRaa | 64 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | globin | 52 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | Firesnowii | 49 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | K1ng♛Eddy | 39 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Norway | +2.90 | 76 | 68 |
| #2 | CaZuRaa | +0.76 | 52 | 55 |
| #3 | 𝖇𝖚𝖋𝖋𝖞 | +0.62 | 66 | 68 |
| #4 | globin | -0.04 | 76 | 61 |
| #5 | K1ng♛Eddy | -0.31 | 20 | 50 |





