








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 387 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Wingman | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1423 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,564 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 609 | 24% |
| Smokes | 281 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 726 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 948 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,283,756 of utility $235 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 162 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dragonlordisaac | 48% | 25 |
| #2 | prosnax | 47% | 219 |
| #3 | ItzaHeko | 47% | 17 |
| #4 | Sirgoodman | 45% | 152 |
| #5 | NightMearMoon | 42% | 170 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | prosnax | 47% | 219 |
| #3 | ItzaHeko | 47% | 17 |
| #4 | Sirgoodman | 45% | 152 |
| #5 | NightMearMoon | 42% | 170 |
| #6 | Starshiptrooper | 35% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prosnax | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | NightMearMoon | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Starshiptrooper | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Sirgoodman | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prosnax | 259 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #2 | NightMearMoon | 243 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #3 | Starshiptrooper | 86 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #4 | Sirgoodman | 69 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | ItzaHeko | 19 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prosnax | +4.87 | 46 | 50 |
| #2 | NightMearMoon | -0.15 | 33 | 40 |
| #3 | dragonlordisaac | -0.28 | 63 | 26 |
| #4 | ItzaHeko | -2.03 | 18 | 26 |
| #5 | Starshiptrooper | -2.08 | 32 | 53 |





