








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 678 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 336 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3221 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,732 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4428 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3687 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3902 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1715 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,517,842 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1054 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EllaGuss88 | 58% | 45 |
| #2 | VillanGames | 49% | 39 |
| #3 | Haza da Cherry | 48% | 73 |
| #4 | Iqon | 48% | 46 |
| #5 | Hush1e.pdf | 45% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EllaGuss88 | 58% | 45 |
| #2 | VillanGames | 49% | 39 |
| #3 | Haza da Cherry | 48% | 73 |
| #4 | Iqon | 48% | 46 |
| #5 | Hush1e.pdf | 45% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EllaGuss88 | 12 | 0.0142 |
| #2 | Haza da Cherry | 6 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | VillanGames | 3 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | Iqon | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Hush1e.pdf | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Iqon | 184 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #2 | Haza da Cherry | 172 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | VillanGames | 145 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | Hush1e.pdf | 99 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | EllaGuss88 | 54 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EllaGuss88 | +5.81 | 83 | 54 |
| #2 | VillanGames | +2.23 | 76 | 56 |
| #3 | Iqon | +2.00 | 66 | 67 |
| #4 | Hush1e.pdf | +1.19 | 36 | 59 |
| #5 | Haza da Cherry | +0.96 | 54 | 55 |





