








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1460 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,026 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 677 | 13% |
| Smokes | 1057 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1891 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 1401 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $248,286 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Pumi | 42% | 24 |
| #8 | Dainosawer<3 | 33% | 12 |
| #9 | Dr4g0n3r™ | 31% | 13 |
| #10 | Cha Lee Kirk | 25% | 8 |
| #11 | Peo | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Floppy<3 | +2.61 | 64 | 68 |
| #2 | Pumi | +2.34 | 73 | 43 |
| #3 | Hamperizh | +1.45 | 69 | 79 |
| #4 | zimre | +1.02 | 69 | 61 |
| #5 | Schattenhauch | -0.41 | 40 | 66 |





