








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 367 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3393 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,592 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3385 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2352 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2726 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2129 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,228,392 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 237 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YanniKoff | 50% | 147 |
| #2 | Schattenhauch | 49% | 61 |
| #3 | Yoda with AK | 49% | 39 |
| #4 | Linara | 49% | 177 |
| #5 | ✪ Floppy<3 | 48% | 283 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Schattenhauch | 49% | 61 |
| #3 | Yoda with AK | 49% | 39 |
| #4 | Linara | 49% | 177 |
| #5 | ✪ Floppy<3 | 48% | 283 |
| #6 | Pumi | 46% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Floppy<3 | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | YanniKoff | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Pumi | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Schattenhauch | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Floppy<3 | 610 | 0.11 | 16 min |
| #2 | YanniKoff | 228 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #3 | Schattenhauch | 199 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | Linara | 119 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| #5 | Pumi | 85 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pumi | +3.60 | 74 | 52 |
| #2 | ✪ Floppy<3 | +2.65 | 66 | 67 |
| #3 | Schattenhauch | +2.18 | 55 | 64 |
| #4 | YanniKoff | +0.25 | 60 | 64 |
| #5 | Dr4g0n3r™ | -0.77 | 68 | 58 |





