








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 871 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 371 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 27 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8011 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,986 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2158 | 15% |
| Smokes | 5447 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 2848 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3533 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,601,563 of utility $189 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 108 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Floppy<3 | 10 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | mGod | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Schattenhauch | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Linara | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | bubblaN | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Floppy<3 | 643 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #2 | Schattenhauch | 508 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #3 | mGod | 466 | 0.29 | 12 min |
| #4 | bubblaN | 329 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #5 | YanniKoff | 239 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pumi | +2.48 | 75 | 47 |
| #2 | ✪ Floppy<3 | +2.10 | 64 | 65 |
| #3 | bubblaN | +1.21 | 61 | 64 |
| #4 | mGod | +1.01 | 77 | 63 |
| #5 | Schattenhauch | +0.43 | 54 | 61 |





