








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 732 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 132 matches | ||
| Premier | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 62 matches | ||
| Faceit | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 29 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5039 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,622 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4594 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2781 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 3257 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3990 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,774,635 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1209 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Salt Talim | 61% | 110 |
| #2 | cat | 59% | 428 |
| #3 | Infinitities1 | 58% | 175 |
| #4 | Lil Baby | 56% | 444 |
| #5 | Mr.CleanBean | 54% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cat | 1173 | 0.14 | 28 min |
| #2 | Lil Baby | 654 | 0.07 | 16 min |
| #3 | Salt Talim | 233 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | Infinitities1 | 199 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | Mr.CleanBean | 151 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tony Soprano | +2.76 | 48 | 52 |
| #2 | Lil Baby | +0.22 | 60 | 57 |
| #3 | Salt Talim | -0.09 | 41 | 49 |
| #4 | cat | -0.80 | 32 | 58 |
| #5 | Mr.CleanBean | -1.30 | 44 | 45 |





